120 Quotations by Steven Wright
- 81. If you tell a joke in the forest, but nobody laughs, was it a joke?
- 82. If you're sending someone some Styrofoam, what do you pack it in
- 83. In Vegas, I got into a long argument with the man at the roulette wheel over what I considered to be ...
- 84. It doesn't make a difference what temperature a room is, it's always room temperature.
- 85. It is a small world, but i wouldn't like to have to paint it.
- 86. It's a good thing we have gravity, or else when birds died they'd just stay right up there. Hunters ...
- 87. It's a small world, but I wouldn't want to have to paint it.
- 88. Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died.
- 89. Last night somebody broke into my apartment and replaced everything with exact duplicates... When I ...
- 90. Last year I went fishing with Salvador Dali. He was using a dotted line. He caught every other fish.
- 91. My friend has a baby. I'm recording all the noises he makes so later I can ask him what he meant.
- 92. My friend invented Cliff's Notes. When I asked him how he got such a great idea, he said, Well, firs ...
- 93. My girlfriend sleeps in a queen-sized bed and I sleep in a court jester-sized bed.
- 94. My neighbor has a circular driveway... he can't get out.
- 95. My roommate got a pet elephant. Then it got lost. It's in the apartment somewhere.
- 96. My theory of evolution is that Darwin was adopted.
- 97. One time I went to a museum where all the work in the museum had been done by children. They had all ...
- 98. Right now i'm having amnesia and deja vu at the same time. i think i've forgotten this before.
- 99. So what's the speed of dark
- 100. The other day when I was walking through the woods, I saw a rabbit standing in front of a candle mak ...
Steven Wright Quotes by Power Quotations
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