105 Quotations by Dave Barry
- 41. If a woman has to choose between catching a fly ball and saving an infant's life, she will choose to ...

- 42. If you have a big enough dictionary, just about everything is a word.

- 43. If you surveyed a hundred typical middle-aged Americans, I bet you'd find that only two of them coul ...

- 44. If you were to open up a baby's head - and I am not for a moment suggesting that you should - you wo ...

- 45. In Spain, attempting to obtain a chicken salad sandwich, you wind up with a dish whose name, when yo ...

- 46. In those days, most people read newspapers, whereas today, most people do not. What caused this chan ...

- 47. It always rains on tents. Rainstorms will travel thousands of miles, against prevailing winds for th ...

- 48. It is a good idea to shop around before you settle on a doctor. Ask about the condition of his Merce ...

- 49. It is a scientific fact that your body will not absorb cholesterol if you take it from another perso ...

- 50. It is a well-known fact that although the public is fine when taken individually, when it forms itse ...

- 51. Karate is a form of marital arts in which people who have had years and years of training can, using ...

- 52. Let's talk about how to fill out your 1984 tax return. Here's an often overlooked accounting techniq ...

- 53. Life is anything that dies when you stomp on it.

- 54. Magnetism, as you recall from physics class, is a powerful force that causes certain items to be att ...

- 55. Miami does not have a visitor-friendly airport. At Miami International, a cramped and dingy labyrint ...

- 56. My therapist told me the way to achieve true inner peace is to finish what I start. So far today, I ...

- 57. Never assume that the guy understands that you and he have a relationship.

- 58. Never lick a steak knife.

- 59. Never under any circumstances take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.

- 60. Newspaper readership is declining like crazy. In fact, there's a good chance that nobody is reading ...

Dave Barry Quotes by Power Quotations
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