3884 Quotations with Even.
- 3581. Steven Wright: I went to a general store but they wouldn't let me buy anything specific.
- 3582. Steven Wright: I went to a general store. They wouldn't let me buy anything specifically.
- 3583. Steven Wright: I went to the bank and asked to borrow a cup of money. They said, What for? I sa ...
- 3584. Steven Wright: I went to this restaurant last night that was set up like a big buffet in the sh ...
- 3585. Steven Wright: I worked in a health food store once. A guy came in and asked me, If I melt dry ...
- 3586. Steven Wright: I wrote a few children's books... not on purpose.
- 3587. Steven Wright: I wrote a song, but I can't read music. Every time I hear a new song on the radi ...
- 3588. Steven Wright: I'm writing a book. I've got the page numbers done.
- 3589. Steven Wright: I've been doing a lot of abstract painting lately, extremely abstract. No brush, ...
- 3590. Steven Wright: If toast always lands butter-side down, and cats always land on their feet, what ...
- 3591. Steven Wright: If you are in a spaceship that is traveling at the speed of light, and you turn ...
- 3592. Steven Wright: If you had a million Shakespeares, could they write like a monkey?
- 3593. Steven Wright: If you saw a heat wave, would you wave back?
- 3594. Steven Wright: If you tell a joke in the forest, but nobody laughs, was it a joke?
- 3595. Steven Wright: In Vegas, I got into a long argument with the man at the roulette wheel over wha ...
- 3596. Steven Wright: It's a good thing we have gravity, or else when birds died they'd just stay righ ...
- 3597. Steven Wright: It's a small world, but I wouldn't want to have to paint it.
- 3598. Steven Wright: My friend has a baby. I'm recording all the noises he makes so later I can ask h ...
- 3599. Steven Wright: My friend invented Cliff's Notes. When I asked him how he got such a great idea, ...
- 3600. Steven Wright: My neighbor has a circular driveway... he can't get out.
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